“Contentment, courage and compassion”
When I was 21 years old, I was inwardly very unsatisfied. I tried everything, and looked everywhere for the one piece I felt I was missing. Nothing outside of me: parties, travel, experiences, night life, friends, material things, gave me long term satisfaction. It was all temporary pleasure. I knew in my heart that contentment and long term joy and love were possible, I just didn´t know where to look.
The fact that I needed more of something, or less of it felt counter productive.
I knew that genuine happiness would be effortless and not dependent on external stimuli.
It was very obvious to me that my "outward search" was the total opposite of peace and contentment.
I will explain the first time that I actually tasted impermanence which is why it has been one of my biggest teachers.
As I mentioned earlier, my early un-satisfaction was very strong and I was stubborn in finding that one missing piece. Please know that I of course was grateful for everything I had, and yet, I knew could love more, accept more, feel more freedom, less judgmental, I knew I had the capacity and courage to embrace the beauty and sorrows of life all at once, instead of fighting it.
I was looking for wisdom, or maybe it was looking for me..
"Searching outward for solutions was like wanting to get rid of thirst by drinking nothing but salt water, endless and exhausting."
During College, my friend invited me to a sweat lodge. On the third and last day, we got out of the lodge and surrounded the outdoor fire in order to have our formal "Closing Ceremony".
It just so happened, that I became extremely dehydrated, fainted and tumbled toward the fire burning 12% of my body.
After 19 surgeries, an immense support from my family, especially from my brother, mother and father, a 3-month depression period, months of physical rehabilitation, therapy, and a lot of sense of humor, I realized that this accident turned out to be a "blessing in disguise", a wake-up call that would change my life and priorities forever.
"Just as a candle cannot burn without fire, men cannot live without a spiritual life."
-The Buddha
It was in a sense what I was longing for, more meaning and depth, a change of perspective, a sense of living "awake and fully aware" vs living in auto-pilot.
After only a few months, I found the Dharma, the Buddha´s teachings, I heard the Buddha´s life story, I recognized how I had been asking myself the same questions. What are the causes of suffering? How does it exist? How can we be free from it? There had to be a solution, I knew it.
studied compassion, emptiness, logic, etc...
I was so inspired and full of joy. I remember saying quietly to myself: “Glad to be back!” I felt immense sense of gratitude pouring out of my heart. I was home.
Since then, I have devoted my life to these teachings that have shown me so much about our human potential and have taught me a vast amount of techniques that help live a life free from fear and old habits, but rather full of spontaneity, genuine love, compassion, freedom, joy and mainly, to me personally, a sense of MISSION, a higher purpose.